Trying so much all the time

I’ve been trying out this morning dance challenge called Nobody’s Watching, which I wrote about here. On a zoom call, the host plays us three songs and the rest of us dance around our bedrooms or living rooms, sometimes in dressing gown and pyjamas.

At first I was super awkward, knowing that any of them could see me. But over time I’ve come to love this way of starting the day. I’m relishing just loving the act of dancing. 

I’ve felt so free. And it’s reminded me of my little nieces who I so admire when they dance. They move in a way that feels good and that’s it – no care or worry about what they look like. Big grins on their faces, having so much fun.

I’ve been spinning, swirling, waving my arms like Kate Bush. It’s so freeing, swirling, swooping, whatever I feel like. 

I realise that so much of my dancing in the past has been about trying to look cool, or look good, painfully aware that I might be being watched. As much as I love dancing I’ve often felt very self-conscious doing so.

And it seems this feeling of trying too hard relates to so much of life. We try so hard to appear a certain way, and care so much about what other people might think. 

We think twice before acting, hold our tongue, paint on a mask of being ok.

This little release each morning is helping me to care less. For 15 minutes I don’t care, I’m not trying, I’m gradually letting myself move in exactly the way I feel. If I look stupid, so what. It really doesn’t matter. What does matter is how it makes me feel. 

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I offer career change coaching – get in touch if you’d like to learn more. Find me on LinkedIn or email at joaopoku@gmail.com.

Photo by Josh Gordon on Unsplash

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